Is Hell exothermic or endothermic
The Thermodynamics of Hell..... citing one of Dr. Schlambaugh's final testquestions for his final exam of 1997. Dr. Schlambaugh is known forasking questions on his finals like: "Why do airplanes fly?" In May1997, the "Momentum, Heat, and mass Transfer II" final exam questionwas: "Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer withproof." Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs usingBoyle's Law or some variant. One student, however wrote thefollowing:First, we postulate that if souls exist, they must have some mass. Ifthey do, then a mole of souls also must have a mass. So, at what rateare souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I thinkwe can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it does not leave.Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering Hell, let'slook at the different religions that exist in the world today. Somereligions say that if you are not a member of their religion, youwill go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions,and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can projectthat all people and all souls go to Hell. With the birth and deathrates what they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell toincrease exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change in thevolume of Hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperatureand pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of thesouls and volume needs to stay constant.A1 So, if Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at whichsouls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell willincrease until all Hell breaks loose.A2 Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increasein souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop and Hellfreezes over.So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by TheresaBanyan during freshman year, that 'It'll be a cold day in Hell beforeI sleep with you,' and taking into account that I still have notsucceeded in having sexual relations with her, then A2 cannot be true;Thus,Hell is exothermic."The student got the only A.
